Sunday, February 14, 2010

Valentines Weekend & Relationship Troubles

Lennon and I drove to Dallas today to visit his parents, make good on his long-standing promise to take me to the aquarium, eat at the Spaghetti Warehouse in the West End, and let me do a little indulgent vintage shopping.  I have been missing my computer time with all of the busy-ness as of late - cleaning, mountains of laundry, work, meeting lots of people with the fabulous Elizabeth at Austin's Tweet-Up, getting honey & cream lattes with Michelle, packing, unpacking, packing again, and practicing guitar (I'm playing three songs at Hangtown on the 25th this month - come see me - it's a Boys and Girls Club fundraiser night!).

This is what I wore to work on Thursday, and as much as I love those turquoise flats, my feet froze when it started pouring glacial rain!

Jeans: Citizens
Flats: Indigo via Buffalo Exchange
Black tank: Wal-Mart
Orange tank: Target
Cardigan: mall boutique in Little Rock
Necklace: Etsy

Lennon and I have been having some troubles that, while not new, are rising to alarming heads due to frequency.  As sad as this makes the cloud around Valentines Day, we are planning on him staying here in Dallas for a few days when I go back to Austin to take a mini-break from each other, (and hopefully realize how much we miss one another).

We have had lots of conversations about how to better communicate before problems become arguments, but of course behavioral changes are difficult.  While the arguments are often harsh - neither of us fight nice - they offer a chance for difficult but necessary character reflection.

What have you done to help get through rough patches in a relationship?  Our relationship tends to move in extremes: it is either intensely positive or intensely negative.  I would like to find a method for balance, not just for our relationship, but for the experience of smoother days, emotions, etc. 

The petty news about this: I'll have to invest in a tripod while he's gone, or find a shelf at a handy height, as he's my prized photographer.

The good news is: we are determined to enjoy the remainder of our weekend and follow through with our trip plans.  Luckily, when removed from the external stress of daily life, we don't fight.

More good news: it's figure skating season!  I LOVE figure skating.

Michelle Kwan: world's most beautiful lady?  Surely she's a contender, (Lennon votes Lady GaGa).

Also - Amy at Ha. Ha. Wait, What? sent me this really sweet award:

I'm going to pass this along to Lauralee, who has a shiny new blog called Martinis and String Bikinis.  I love you, cousin!


Michelle said...

That cardigan is effing cuuuuuute!

The reason I asked if you were off tomorrow is because I thought maybe we could hit up BX, since it's always such a clusterfuck on the weekend! And I could take a look at the dress you want taken out and see if it'd be doable (a lot of it depends on the construction of the dress).

Unfortunately, I don't have too many relationship tips...Matt and I are pretty much the same way, either we're getting in yelling matches 3x a week or it's all hunky dory. Corny as it sounds, usually when we're fighting about something there's a specific underlying issue that one or both of us is upset about - sitting down and talking it out (having agreed beforehand not to yell) helps some. Good luck!


lauralee said...

Aww you're sweet!! :) Thanks for the shout out! I love you too!

Sorry about your troubles...I'm only a phone call away if you wanna talk!

pinksundrops said...

No advice for the roller coaster, but one thing that has helped the ups and downs be less severe is the Five Love Languages book, and recognizing the Crazy Cycle when it starts (that one was KEY). Also, I saw the authors of the Five Love Languages just came out the Five Apology Languages - can't wait to read it! I always suspected different apologies mean different things to different people. Google any of those terms and they're the first search link that comes up! Good luck, girl, it's an adventure.

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