Somedays I'm Glad I Didn't Go To Law School

Like most English majors I knew, I was thisclose to law school.  It was that or teaching, since the goal of (I assume) most English majors - writing professionally - can seem woefully unrealistic and out of reach when walking past the podium bearing the university's official seal.  Once crossed, I opted for teaching.  I'd been substitute teaching throughout undergrad, and on the days that teachers left me actual lesson plans instead of a movie, I would drive home ecstatic, (except for that day in the kindergarten glass - between the crying, the pottying, the penguin play, and the fisticuffs over stickers - I almost kicked in the door to the playground to run away screaming). 

Today I had to wake up early for what is termed "food run Friday."  At 9AM I go to one of our sites in East Austin to get on a moldy bus, drive to Capital Area Food Bank, and pick up boxes and boxes and boxes of canned food, frozen meat, drinks, etc, to deliver to all of our other sites so that the kids can have dinner and snacks for the upcoming week, (every staff member does this one Friday a month). 

omg these boxes are heavy

Capital Area Food Bank also delivers.  Every Friday morning that I've pulled up to our East site, CAFB has had a large truck parked on the lawn, folding tables set up, and a long line of people waiting to get a few free bags of groceries.  I am always overwhelmed by the urge to ditch the warehouse-to-kitchen delivery, and instead jump behind a table to help pass out the grocery sacks. 

Now before I begin to enter Polyanna Sunshine Vomit mode, let me talk about a few of the things that make me really cynical about my job:

1) I hate it when loads of logistics and administrative work go into giving our kids free things, and there is not a thank you in sight.  For example: we are able to give free, BRAND NEW expensive tennis shoes (they seriously gave away the same pair of New Balances I bought for $160 last year), to kids through the Shoes for Austin program.  Rather than look happy, there were some kids who complained they didn't like the style of shoe they got.  I wanted to throw a shoe at them. 

2) Sometimes we are able to give away daily bus passes to kids to get home after programming.  Bus passes, even though discounted for our program and AISD, are still expensive.  Yet once word gets out that we have a fresh batch, there are ten kids surrounding me, stating that they need a bus pass, now, as though sleeping at school is the only other option.  The stipulation for getting one is having participated in one of our programs.  If they haven't met this requirement by my standards, then all hell and whining breaks lose, and sometimes a helpless chair gets shoved around in anger.

3) Free dinner, three times a week, and snacks on the non-dinner days.  How many plates of food have I had to go around and throw away because they were left throughout our facility?  Um, lots.  It's gross, and I get quite bitter about it. 

4) Ok, is my point made?  Trying to be giving isn't always easy, cheerful, or fun.  But that's true of everything.  If I was to stand on my cyber soap box and talk about how beautiful it is every day to work with disadvantaged populations, I'd hope everyone would label my writing as one-sided, false, and (dare I write it) falling into, in literature, what we call the "noble savage" syndrome, which would be a disgusting viewpoint. 

Now that I've got reality in check, I do want to talk about how awesome my job is sometimes, and how no amount of money can pay for the feeling that comes along with seeing someone else become empowered in a positive way. 


Girls Rock Camp is close to my heart and a perfect example.  Last night they had ten girls, most of them shy and nervously giggling, get set up with a drum set or a guitar, possibly for the first time in their lives.  No boys were allowed, despite several of them begging for a chance to come in during the girl's time, and (brace yourself for what sounds like cheese but isn't), the smiles on the girls faces when they had their instrument in hand was a month's paycheck.  Having been (still am?) a shy girl, I knew exactly what they were feeling when being told that they are talented, even if that talent hasn't been fully developed yet, they have a right to make noise, and have a supportive and eager audience of peers and adults.

Emily Marks, Heather Webb, and the other ladies of GRC really do rock! 

The "I Can" attitude is what we try to instill in all the programs we run.  "I Can" make good choices, "I Can" succeed at something constructive and beneficial, "I Can" interact with people who have my best interests in mind, "I Can" move beyond whatever has felt limiting in the past, "I Can" solve conflicts without self-destructive behavior or straight up quitting everything.

The difficulty is getting the kids to participate in programs - as we often compete with sports, babysitting, jobs, and the beyond-comprehension allure of walking around and doing nothing in the academic off hours.  Regardless, it's amazing how seeing ten girls with an instrument for the first time, ten boys excited about having an open forum of communication with an adult they admire, ten kids learning to knit because it looked like fun, ten people who really need food and are thankful to get just two bags of it early on a Friday morning, can make me glad that I'm not at a different job.  (Let's just not talk about the massive amount of paperwork, deadlines, and non-profit [quite literal] pay check for now...).

I don't read the bible much anymore, even though I keep meaning to sit down and do so, (and the Koran, and the Talmud...), but there is a verse from it that I try to remember when my kids are being especially moody, rude, or just all around difficult.  While not verbatim, it goes to the gist of Jesus saying to treat everyone you encounter - beggars, mean people, your mother in law - as though they were really him in disguise. 

Essentially, love all, and be patient with all, even if it's hard.   (Sometimes it's really hard.)

I know everyone is focused on helping Haiti right now, but if there's anyone looking to keep up that spirit and help out in Austin, here a few excellent places to start:

• Frontsteps - working to end homelessness.  Lennon and I plan to sign up as weekend volunteers.
  
• Capital Area Food Bank - helping Austin's hungry.
• Girls Rock Camp - empowering girls through music.
• The Salvation Army - they do a lot for homelessness in Austin.
• The United Way - in addition to helping fund my paycheck, what don't they do?
• Volunteer Healthcare Clinic - they do office work if you don't draw blood or stuff like that.
• Yellow Bike Project - this is brilliant.  I wish I'd thought of it.
• Tree Folks - Urban forestry.  Do you like clean air?  I do.
• Helping Hands Home for Children - right in Hyde Park!
• Animal Rescue - At Buffalo Exchange, I give my token to the puppies.
• Humane Society - see above.

And of course...

• The Boys and Girls Club of Austin - you want to volunteer?  You can go to this website, or you can also call me.  I'll put you to work!  And by work I mean playing soccer, pool, arts and crafts...

Arturo weeding fruit trees at Tree Folks

 LBJ Kiddo with a wheel barrow at Tree Folks

 Me!  With dirt!  And no shower yet!

What causes do you like to contribute towards?  Are there any Austine and/or national organizations that I left off?

I'm also curious how other Austinites feel about the people with signs who stand by the highways.  Do you give them money?  Or food?  I never have, and I get this horrible feeling in my gut because a) I don't want to roll down my window because I'm paranoid, b) there are homeless guys outside my apartment who sit and drink beer from large cans all day and c) I give a little money to my church, and they put a lot of their finances towards charity, including homelessness.  Somehow, I still feel like crap.

A Hard Year for Texas and Non-Profits

For the Texas vs. Alabama National Football Championship, two great things happened.  First, I went to a watch party with Lennon and some of our friends at their cozy apartment, and second, I completed a first for my life, in that I actually watched the whole game.  I didn't even do that when I physically went to Razorback games.  Even though I was born in Alabama, I chose Texas as my home so I sported the closest things I had to burnt sienna.  I even bought cheddar Sun Chips in the orange bag (the realization came post-purchase), and of course had my Ziegenbock six pack, available only in Texas.  In searching that link, I just read some hater reviews comparing Shiner to Ziegenbock, and while I love Shiner, Ziegenbock is a dollar cheaper!  Times are tough, as reading on will prove.

 
Orange sweatshirt: J. Crew
Collared shirt: Gap
Lace tank top: White House Black Market
Barely visible star necklace: Street vendor on Lover's Lane in Izmir, Turkey
Bracelet: Elle, a boutique no longer in existence (tear! The owners were family friends) from Little Rock
Jeans: Sevens from Buffalo Exchange
Orange shoes: from Dillards

Can I mention it was 30 degrees outside at that moment?  Lennon was wearing a wool pea coat while snapping these pictures and complaining of being cold.  Thin-skinned Dallas-ite!

As I mentioned "times are tough" earlier, I want to share a snippet of my work with everyone today:

The non-profit I work for, (I've probably already given my place of employment away, whatever), has an annual event called Season of Caring, where money, clothes, everything a person could need, are donated to a deserving family in the Austin area.  It's been a rough year financially for us, and for everyone, but luckily people are still kind enough to give.

Sometimes people's hearts are in the right place, but their actions make me giggle.  Example above: This "anonymous contribution" came in the mail to the main office with the note on the side: "research value."  Inside were these stamps.  A few of them are still usable, the rest are canceled.  Grand net worth: $2.30

Maybe I'm mistaken?  Anyone know if I rescued a fortune from the office's trash can?  Anyone in desperate need of these particular year-old stamps and willing to "pay" for them in order to make a contribution to a national non-profit that helps kids?  ....worth a shot.

So, a tough year for Texas all around.  Although, I think that Gilbert kid is going to be stellar.  What a showing for a freshman on one of his first runs off the bench!  Too bad half of his team had butter fingers last night.  Either way, it doesn't affect me too much, because we all know where my heart lies:

Awesome Apron

Flapper Dress: 101 + Female Writers of the 1920's

To paraphrase the Austin Eavesdropper, tomorrow night is when gardening meets Gatsby at The Liberty bar in East Austin.  This means it's time to break out the fringe, feathers, and fedoras to go out on the town and have a "hotsy-totsy" good time.  I love dressing up, I love sustainable gardening, and I certainly love a party.  Also, keeping in mind that once an English teacher, always an English teacher: I love female writers of the roaring twenties. 

Dorothy Parker - Often recognized as a member of the Algonquin Round Table, Dorothy Parker is an author who is often quoted but too little read.  She had a sardonic wit, a tumultous love life, and a busy pen, seeing as she wrote short stories, novels, poems, screen plays, magazine articles... a sad theme of her work was typically along the lines of "you're born, you think life is great, really it sucks, then you die," but in between the start and the finish, she's really funny and painfuly astute.

Zelda Fitgerald - "The Flapper awoke from her lethargy of sub-deb-ism, bobbed her hair, put on her choicest pair of earrings and a great deal of audacity and rouge and went into the battle. She flirted because it was fun to flirt and wore a one-piece bathing suit because she had a good figure ... she was conscious that the things she did were the things she had always wanted to do. Mothers disapproved of their sons taking the Flapper to dances, to teas, to swim and most of all to heart." - Z. Fitzgerald, 'Eulogy of the Flapper.'  A dancer, a writer, a drunk, a hell-raiser, a muse, and an entrenching subject of biography. 

Gertrude Stein - While I don't understand her tender-buttons type writing, I felt like The Autobiography of Alice B. Toklas was peeking into a 1920's Paris salon through a telescope.  I have monolithic respect for a lady who didn't need a man to take care of her, kept the egos of the day in check, was a proprieter of art and literature, and didn't feel the need to follow the rules of "ladylike" behavior.

So, in celebration of the flapper era and the swell women who occupied it, here are my tips to dressing up like a genuine, renaissance lady of the roaring twenties:

1) High-heeled, strappy shoes with round toes.

2) Strings and strings of faux-pearl necklaces.

3) Swirly skirts, drop waist dresses, sleeveless blouses, sequins, and fringe that emphasizes the swing of your hips when you do the Charleston.

4) GIN.  (bathtub optional).

These are items I dug out of my closet, but if you want a true education on dressing in vintage style, then it is imperative that you visit the Vintage Vivant herself: a fellow Austinite, and also a former Arkansas girl (and U of A alum, too!) Amelia.  You can find her at Toy Joy, her daily fashion blog, or at her Etsy shop, where you can purchase hand sewn, lovely, (and sometimes naughty), items, such as this tidy-cloth.  Also be sure to read her post on how to apply 1920's style makeup, it's very important for proper appearances tomorrow night!

It seems only appropriate to end this particular post the following way:

My candle burns at both ends;

It will not last the night;

But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends--

It gives a lovely light!

 

Because first and foremost, Edna St. Vincent Millay is my homegirl.  See you tomorrow!

Perks of the Job: Free T-Shirts, and a Wee Bit About the Austin Film Society

Working in a non-profit may not come with glamour or high-pay, but one thing I do get plenty of: free t-shirts!  Earlier this week, Jonny Stranger game me this one from the Austin Film Society.  At first, I saw it was a large and was afraid I would swim in it, but to my glee (surprise!?) it fits perfectly.  To my chagrin, upon viewing this photograph, I realize I neglected to consider that using a mirror would result in the words coming out backwards... sigh.

I didn't know this when I first moved to Austin, but it's quite the film hub.  My step-sister's first job interview was with Troublemaker Studios, and then I was informed that all of the celebrities staying in town can be spotted on South Congress because they stay in the Hotel San Jose.  I've never been much of a celeb-spotter, but I did work at the Bunch of Grapes in Martha's Vineyard one summer, and I checked out Spike Lee and Michael J Fox; I certainly felt special at the time. 

I've never been much of a film buff - but I am snob enough to turn my nose up at beloved movies such as Elf, (no matter how much I love Bob Newhart), and my students' first question when I brought in a movie was "Does it have subtitles?" (with a long groan). 

Nonetheless, I regret having missed the Austin Film Festival this year - but it won't happen again.  Until then, I'm happy being a patron of Austin orignals I Luv Video and the Alamo Drafthouse, and now that I'm signed up to follow AFS tweets, maybe I'll be more up to date on screenings and premieres, or accidently swagger into the background of a movie set - seeing as Austin IS a "blockbuster location."

Oh - and I can't forget my hand delivered copy of P.O.V. - I appreciate every little bonus I get.  And I doubly appreciate Jonny's comic on claymation, as he's been working on claymation with my students, and I enjoy his Prometheus reference, being an English teacher at heart.  Bottom line: yay free stuff.  I'll call it my non-profit swag. 

I also get to beam over cool things my kids make with Jonny, like this!  Wish I had this program in Arkansas ten years ago...